Pixie Styx

    Somnambulance

    Sunday, April 27, 2008, 08:00 PM [Creative Writing]

    Sestinas follow a strict pattern of the repetition of the initial six end-words of the first stanza through the remaining five six-line stanzas, culminating in a three-line envoi.  (And, let me just say, this was trickier than I thought it would be and I'm not sure it's quite finished yet.)  The form is as follows, where each numeral indicates the stanza position and the letters represent end-words:

    1. ABCDEF     2. FAEBDC     3. CFDABE     4. ECBFAD     5. DEACFB     6. BDFECA

    7. (envoi) ECA or ACE

    The envoi, sometimes known as the tornada, must also include the remaining three end-words, BDF, in the course of the three lines so that all six recurring words appear in the final three lines. In place of a rhyme scheme, the sestina relies on end-word repetition to effect a sort of rhyme.

    I don't usually write poetry and this is my first attempt at a sestina.  The subject of sleepwalkers/living dead/sheeple has come up a couple of times lately, most recently in Cerberus' blog, so I thought I would post this poem.  Freeback and critiques are always welcome.  (Just be kind, please!) 

    Somnambulance

    Not quite asleep, yet not quite awake;

    They go through life like the living dead.

    They don't even realize they're not alive

    And never take the time to stop and think.

    It's so much easier to perpetually sleep.

    They can't even bring themselves to dream.

     

    The living dead don't dare to dream

    Because they're too afraid to be truly awake.

    They don't know to be awake is better than to sleep,

    But it's much more difficult than being dead.

    Because when you're awake you have to think

    And make a conscious effort to be alive.

     

    The truly living prefer to be alive

    But that doesn't mean they don't dream.

    It simply means they choose to think

    And they know the real value of being awake.

    The truly living feel sorry for the living dead

    And pray one day they'll wake from their sleep.

     

    By going through life always asleep

    They miss out on what makes us alive.

    Sense is dulled and imagination dead

    With no creativity to even dream.

    For to live life fully is to be awake

    And aware of things that make you think.

     

    To look for deeper meanings, I think,

    In subconscious dreams when you sleep

    And in daydreams when you're awake,

    Helps you to be open, aware and alive.

    The truly living dare to dream

    But that's too risky for the living dead.

     

    So they continue living as if they're dead,

    It's frightening when they're forced to think

    And gods forbid they should dare to dream.

    They think nothing at night when they go to sleep,

    Not knowing what they're missing by not being alive

    And asking questions about life and living awake.

      

    Thus the living dead keep their dreamless sleep

    While the rest think it's better to be alive

    And know the joy and magic of being truly awake.

    0 (0 Ratings)

    OMG's I can't even wrap my head around this, lol! I'll be back when the headache subsides... I'm intrigued :P
    Blessings and love for a wonderful week!
    xxx ooo

    Heather
    April 28, 2008
    10:29 AM CST

    oh wow! i'm gonna gobble this up in the am. i'm off to bed now. i wanna give it my full attention! ;)

    Alysia, Bran's Chroi
    April 29, 2008
    11:12 PM CST

    this is awesome! wow! that is a tough poem style to do. you are a brave one to give it a go! especially since you are not big on writing poetry! great job! the meaning behind it is wonderful too! i really like the point of it. :) bravo!! (((hugs))) and astral high fives!~

    Alysia, Bran's Chroi
    April 30, 2008
    06:04 PM CST

    Ok, I'm back... I almost forgot! ...and may I say "Holy crap!"
    You're a braver woman than I :) Great subject too! In awe of your ability with the written word... seriously.
    xxx ooo

    Heather
    May 04, 2008
    08:35 PM CST